Insides

I want to snatch these knots that have dug a grave in my stomach out and hand them to you
so you can see what they've done to my insides

I want to drain my body of water
so that tears are no longer a possibility

I want to have my brain worked on
in that sunshine of the spotless mind kind of way

I want to have my heart mechanically timed
so that it could never race again-just. stay. on. one. beat

I want to remove my eardrums and become deaf
so that the sounds of songs won't remind me of you

I want to lose my sense to smell
so some one's scent won't linger like yours.

I want to develop some impossible to pronounce and rare disease
one that will make me unable to feel emotion.

I want for all my limbs to fall asleep in that prickly kind of way and remain in R.E.M
so that a touch can't be felt or remembered.

I want to remove the place where my soul resides and fill it with sand
so that it can't feel empty without a mate.

I want for the want of wanting you to disappear completely cuz clearly its messing with my insides.